i feel really down these few days..
thanks waiyap...
you are the only one who can actually make me laugh these few days..
thanks alot for the cheers...
sorry for last time ...its because of last time i seemed kinda like ignoring u ....
...anyway ..i get to know u well dy ...
no more k ..
so dont worry...

i m sorry that i didnt promise to forget about the past ...
it was still remain clearly in my mind...
and it keeps bother me since that day
and i went back to the past just to find back my own happiness ...
but it was all changed...
it was not like before...
i felt that there are now more sadness behind all this...
where is all the happiness that we had before..?
where is all the sweet memories of us...?
it was all gone...it was like just happened a few hours ago and it disappear in just a second..
but no..it's not...i should be dreaming now....yeah i am ...
i am still wondering if its true or i was just daydreaming before this...
it aint true ....everything was just my imagination
yeah it should be ...
~love hurts so much~

i m going to get my contact lense soon ...
cant wait to get it neh ....
last night i went out with baobao and vuivui...
actually last night lingling said she gonna find us right after she had her dinner with her family ...
but then
AGAIN....she didnt come to join us...
seems like she always give us a plane...*.*haha ...just kidding ..
bao brought his laptop ...
we went to bistro onlined...
we have a lot of fun chatting with ivan and tomato zai through msn and also skype...
we also did play 3g...ngek ngek~
well ..they said they wanna looked for the two girls who are working there...
so we zoomed in for them ..
they kinda like pervert neh..=X
dont be angry if u guys saw this..
haha ..
well ...i did saw a jerk ..
he sat beside my table...
i pretended like i dont even know him ....
i still remember he didnt even give back my disc that i lended to him ..
what a jerk.....he's always a jerk ....sigh~

i will continue to love u as long as i can ...

i didnt blog for days neh ...maybe can say about one week ...
its not because i dont want to write but there is still something, its better to put it as a secret in my heart ...
i m still havent make up my mind whether i need to go to kk to study ...
there are many things that would kinda like wanted me to go there...
well ...i think most of all i would be thinking about baby ...
i miss him so much ...
and of course if i could go there to study ..we will have much time together ...
but ..once i thought of now ...i m totally depend on my parents too much ...
i would not like to leave so fast nah ..that's the problem ..
my lil sister is going next year ....
i would be not getting use of the life without her laughs and also sometimes we quarrelled...
i will be missing all these things...
sigh~ what can i do..?
today ... i was surprised to see jason and james came to church neh... miss them so much...i thought they would be staying at home doing their revision as they are having spm now...
well ganbatte guys ...
we chatted about crap things ....and discussed about lil sissy ....haha ..
it was fun...
this afternoon ...i mean just now, i went to jog with baobao,lingling and vuivui...
before that me, bao and ling went to have drinks at qqice..
we chatted about courses that we r taking now ...and sadly bao said he will be going to kk to study soon and probably next year ...
see....everyone is going now ...
going somewhere to study ...
what about me..?
at that time i saw many girls ...i mean ladies...and also some underage were smoking ..
oh gosh ... i felt disappointment in a sudden ...
say NO to SMOKING!
we didnt jog much ...because of raining ...
so we went home ....
sigh~ boring ...
need to drive by myself without companion .....so scary ....anyway i went home safely ..
thanks God for being there for me throughout the journey ..
keke ..
*end*

if only time will rewind back to the 1st day of this year...
if only i could change the past ...
if only i could meet u back....we will start again like before..
if only u would never ever did that to hurt me
if only u werent blame me for everything ...when i was kindly telling the truth..

and if that could happen ....things will not become like this in reality ..
well ...if the 'if' is occured in our reality ...all the ppl in the whole world wouldnt be starving!
now
u cant put 100% trust in a person ....
for u at last will be the one who hurt deeply...
my dearest goh goh....yeah ...you are right ....you told me that this is what we called it life....
yeah i m totally agree with that now..
life goes like that ...whether u like it or love it or not...
and we should remember our life is in God's hand ..
we could never predict what will happen next ...
maybe what had happened now ....God is just wanna give me the experience ...
so that i would not easily hurt by someone else in the future...because there is still a long way to go..
well ...i trust God like always...
i shouldnt cry because of what u did to me ...
because i think its stupid ...
and an apologise doesnt even mean a thing for me ...'sorry no cure'
if only a word sorry can change everything to be better...what for we still need police in this world..?
take action is the most important ...
if u expect me to trust u back after the apology that u had made...
sorry i wouldnt do that anymore....and NO MORE!
after u had apologized....u didnt change ....and things get much worse than before..
so what's the point u apologized?
i really dont understand ....
i try to pretend nothing had happened now ...
i tried but now ....
i felt that what u said to me were all CRAP!
u even tried to 'persuade' someone to trust u ....wow ....u r great ...!
-life-{i m gaining much experience throughout the whole incident...thanks to u}

-what a bad bad day-

i went to town with my parents and my lil bro this morning ...
i didnt take breakfast at home ...so i took it at my shop ..
felt like long time didnt go to daddy's shop ..
well ....i did help my aunt and the helper, moi jiejie to do the sales
i m not daddy's lil princess okay ...i got help neh ..
= =...
there are quite many ppl went to town today ..maybe it's because of today is public holiday ...<----this is such a crap ...of course everyone knows there would be many ppl at town on public holiday there is nothing special about this morning at town ... but in the afternoon ..... here it is .. this afternoon i went out having drinks with suekiun,bao and angie at seven heaven before going to jog... bao fetched me and sue...he drove proton today instead of matrix... where is his so called nice car...? haha i really dont understand why bao always keep teasing me about my skill of driving ... anyway i dont mind ...i know he just want me to observe him when he is driving ... well ..what can i say ....he has a 'professional' skill of driving ...as what he told me .. please dont be mad if u saw this ..... anyway ..yeah ..he is really having good skill in driving what ... coz i did follow his car sometimes ....no la actually almost everytime we got out ... =X after that we went to jog and this time ah vui joined us together... he drove kancil today but where is his kenari...i did ask him why did he drive kancil today? this is what he answered" my kenari had shrunk already" ... talk about him ...of course we did fight again ... but quite less dy since he was so concentrate with the scientific name of those plants ....wow .. such a hardworking science student! let us give him a big applause....!clap clap! while we were jogging ....ah vui found a jungle track ... well at 1st they said better not going in la ..maybe quite long neh the track...but then they all go in... u know what ....i hate going for jungle tracking ....but everyone was going in that time ....i had no choice so i followed them ... euw ...i had a bad sense that i would be encountered a snake ...i hate snake! ....<---such a silly imagination...haha i asked bao to walk behind me ...and i felt safe...=X on the way i did slipped down...this is why i called it a bad day for me ...i was actually sat on the muddy and my shorts got dirty.. luckily it didnt hurt my butt...haha ..
we finished up our jogging track and went to qq ice to 'yum cha' again ..
there was a waitress ....we asked for more tomato sauce but she thought we were asking for french fries again ...
when she came with the french fries ...we said "that's not ours". she was like staying there like numb already for a few seconds then she took away the french fries .....
so careless....sigh~ pity for her...
time for going home ...
and so that's all for today ...

forgiving u is really a hard thing for me ...but stop loving u is much more harder than anything else...
and now that i had forgiven u ...please dont hurt me anymore..i dont wanna feel the pain like stabbing a knife deep into my heart ...
it will be really suffering ...
baby i love u so much ...
for now that u had made ur promise to me please dont ever break it anymore ..
without u in my life i will be like completely lost ...
and i dont really know what to do and where m i suppose to go ...
please take the promise as a commitment for both of us ...
and try to remain this relationship as long as we can ...
thanks baby ...for making that promise for me again ....the only thing that i hope is ..that incident would not be happen for the second time ...
NOT even a chance to be occur for the second time ...

everything has changed since yesterday afternoon ..
i m no more silly as u guys think about me before ...
NO MORE! ...
well u also do think that i m silly right ..
that's why u did that to me..? was that the reason ...? u thought that i wouldnt be mind did you..?
i thought everything is going great since u were with me
but no more for today ..
not now and after this please no ... i m not a fool k..
i was totally upset and i did cried...u know how much hurt i felt....my heart was like breaking into pieces... when u told me since..
its really hardly to hide crying quietly....i tried to force myself not to cry but i really cant take it anymore and i cried non stop....my eyes got swollen and i dont even dare to face my family..
i have thought of doing something crazy but then i thought of my family and my friend who actually care and love me ...
i had trusted u so much... i just hoping u will always think of me 1st whatever u do...but what's the payback?
time will heal up my pain as what my friend told me...thanks my dear..
promises that u have made for me ....i have thought that as a rubbish and thrown it away..
things that u told me i m still wondering if its really true..
yeah i did break my promise for not to leave u..
but the promises that u broke are much more than me..
i tried to delete everything about u in my comp and also mobile ..
but i admit i cant delete u in my mind ...
i will still miss u so much ..
but i will try not to do that sometimes ..
i regret of putting too much love on u
there is no way i can forgive u like this ...
maybe that is my destiny ....and we dont have any fate at all..
maybe we really dont mean to be together afterall ..
we should end up since my birthday ...but i am still loving u ...i dont want to leave u .....but u force me to...i really have no choice...
yeah ....if we were ended up at that time at least it wasnt making me as hurt as now ...
Why fate always play us around?
i pray everyday for our relationship will go smoothly ....
but it didnt lastly ....
it doesnt mean that i would be blaming God for that ...
it is fate doesnt come to us ....
i still cant make myself to forget about u ..
i m still loving u so much ..
i know ...i shouldnt blame u for all da fault ...since u got ur reason ..
but ..if u really do love me ....u would think about me 1st than that ..
but u chose what ur desire 1st ...not me at all ..
why ....how could do this to me ..
i rather choose that u had lied me all along...at least i wont get that hurt like now...
but ....now..
i only can hope that u r just kidding with me ...just want to make me feel worry or sad or something...
i was taking that as a hope since yesterday
i should be awake now ...i must accept it as it is a reality...
u asked to be friends ...sorry i really cant make it ....
u seemed like u r treating this incident was not really serious dont u..?
not for me ...
before i end this up ..
i wanna say that i really miss u so much ...
if only u could do something to wound up my pain ...
but there is no way u would do that for me right ..
i m too stupid for that and that's why causing this incident to be happen ...
i should blame myself and not u ...
the only thing that i can conclude here is we have no fate and we were not mean to be together..
i m still loving u~

oh happy day~

yesterday ...as usual we were having assembly in the schoolthis assembly take the longest time since i was at this school this year....
maybe because today starts holiday and i dont feel like listening to what teacher wanna say ....anyway .... every assembly will still be ended at the end ....haha ..
i was quite nervous that time ....well ..i didnt cut my fingernails ...it is really long.
luckily i didnt get 'saman' by our girls' ketua pengawas to be ...i passed....haha
after school ended ..
i went out with suekiun,angie,ling,mrlai,hungpak and kok khen ...
we were all going to take lunch at meingar ...<-- a restaurant which is quite famous for their prawn mee ...i heard that ... after that we went to kawaii ...well ...we were not there to buy anything ....we were just trying to pass our time and also planned for the next destination to go ... we had made up our decision to go to taman anib again<----play water cycle ..{NOT AGAIN} well this time we were all playing splashing water to one another .... while we tried to change the water cycle with one another ...ling slipped and fell into the lake ...luckily hungpak acted fast .....he pulled her up ....we felt very nervous that time ... we were all wet ...add we got really smelly ...because of the dirty lake water that we played with ..mr lai sent me and suekiun home when we were all quite dry up ..but my school shoes still all in wet ....so i didnt go to school today i was really having a great time ... today ....angie had given me suching pendrive for the pictures that we took on my birthday celebration ... here are they ...

3 wira with automatic gear out together that night ...however they are not the same colour[the silver one is mine] =X ...we called it as 'WIRA TEAM'

it was taken in the park in taman utama ...angie and jer are acting like a monkey climbing a tree ..so naughty~

well ...we are trying to do a model pose ...but i didnt look like one ...it was like i m pregnant in the pic..
hey guys and girls ...look ..there is something there ...{where i pointed}
hien ....euw ..this is NOT a suitable time ...well for jer ...dont smile like that..ppl will think that u are a pervert ...put ur hand down...=X

playing see-saw together ....well ..i cant play ...because i was wearing a dress ...

me and su ching's cake ...
let us make a wish ...before blowing off the candles
dear pity jer... why r u sitting on the floor neh ...there are many place to sit my dear...
*smile* ...suching hey hey ....smile at the camera...dont just remember the cake...we will be eating it very soon ...okay ...?

the fresh cream fell on my heels add toes ...euw ..so gross ...my new heels ....sigh~
wow ...nice shot....well ur 5 ...is that a pose...? =P
yummy huh?! ling ling was trying to laugh actually but her mouth full of cake ..so she hardly give a smile at the camera ...
just a quickshot from hien ...when he was trying to find something to take ...
nah! many 'wan tan' that we have made there ...so dirty ....+untidy ...

all those fress creams which suching's had gathered it together in one piece of tissue ..

can u find me in that picture..?

i was freakishly get shocked because bao suddenly become so tall ... so unbelievable ... ican and waijuin are closing their eyes<---not time for going into dreamland now ...come back ..!....where is ah vui..? r u there..? first time get everyone here to take picture together ...thanks for coming ...na na na na..

miss u guys ...

well well well...
yesterday ...hing was going to fly back to pj and for feijia,ivan and weijuin....ther were going back to melaka .....
miss them neh ...
our life now have back to the normal life ...not always out dy ...since yesterday ..
i did went to the airport to send them off ..<---is it right...well ...whatever!
angie came to fetch me yesterday morning ...
then we straight away to aiport lo ..
when we reached we found ivan and weijuin lo....weijuin face looked like a tomato leh...i wonder why his face always in red...=X ...shy...i dont think so..we chatted for awhile..
at that time i tried to find hing neh and we took some pictures....
after that we went home ....me and angie nearly got lost on the highway ...
anyway...at last we went home safe and sound ..

last night i went out with bao,suekiun,vui and angie ...+ liau also..
liau was with us but not for long then he went to cinema ....i did asked him with who ...but he didnt answer...<---should be something behind...ngek ngek~
we went to Bistro after ah liau went to cinema ..
we had a great time teasing each other...but i got lost in the end ...
i m totally mad at ahvui and totally disappointed with him ..<---actually i was just kidding anyway ..
bao kept asking me to take a cab home...
how could he do this to me neh..?well..i know he was just wanna gik me ..
k later then i followed his car to go home...-end-

a trip to taman anib

well after the graduation ceremony ended...
me and ling decided to find mr laivunpiau and also kok khen to take some picture...
we asked along suekiun too to take with us ...
here are they ...

me and mr laikokkhen,me and mr lai....trying to punch them nah!~

me and kokkhen ...well ...this is his idea of posing....kinda weird but cool...
there is always a *peace* for me to take a good shot..haha

after having lunch with kok khen and also mr lai at hionhiong pan min.... ling went home with angie while me and suekiun followed mr lai's car and hung around with them to servay supermarket....and also hypermarket ...kok khen told us that Servay is his and giant is mr lai's ....well we know that's not true of course ..

but he kept saying just take what u want ...no need to pay ....lol...he is really funny ...then i asked him why they never greet u ...then he told me that he had told his stuff not to treat him like a boss when he come ...he said he wants to be humble ...oh kokkhen kokkhen ..it's kinda fun to hang out with them ..u will never get bored...after awhile ...mr lai's said he need to go to loo ...okay ..
he needed us to wait him at outside the toilet... how could he be ...he doesnt worth for us to wait him at that place la ..= =
later then he brought us to taman anib... we chatted happily before going for a ride on the so called a'BOAT' ...haha ..

mr lai ...u r too good in posing ....

get bored of chatting so i took one picture of mine ....keke

this is what i was desiring to ride on at that time but ...mr lai kept saying the sun is too hot liao .."okay then fine", i said. "if u keep asking for it again i will throw u into the pond", he said madly ....hey...i didnt do anything wrong ...i just asking for it ...it didnt bother you much please mr lai... but then lastly we went to have a ride ....me and suekiun took the red one while mr lai and kokkhen took the yellow one...

mr lai sat like a boss in this picture ...pity kokkhen...he was the only one to ride the so called BOAT that time ...

this whity parrot we saw it behind the restaurant ....well ... we called it STUPID as it doesnt know how to speak ....study hard STUPID!

the cutest deer among all ....so i took a picture of it ...kakathere is a deer community behind the restaurant in a small "animal's park" quite many hor...The orangutan is actually saying thanks for visiting?! ....<----well you're welcome...and we will come again ..BYE BYE orangutan...

02112007

yesterday was our school graduation day ...but not for me of course...

it's for form 5 and upper 6 students...

as for some prefects included me was having duty on that day ...

anyway ..

there was one teacher kept asking us to sit down ...okay then we sat lo.....we have nothing to do with it ..

it's good also that we can all sit ...haha ...its tiring to stand for about 2 hours until the programme ended ...

during my duty time ....

i have taken some pictures with angie,ling and also su ching ..

wow ..these few days i was addicted to take pictures with my friends ...well of course i have to share them here in my blog...

me and ling ling

angie and me

me and su ching

01112007

no teacher was teaching on that day so we were all having fun playing UNO cards that i brought to school...

and we had taken loads pictures too..

here are some of them ...

Uno player....cheeze~

oho...ling what are u doing there ah..?! haha

i looked pale in this pic....hey liau why are covering up your face..?

whose butt is that..?<---well it's ah hien's...haha ..his pants is wet....so we are trying to use Uno cards to fan it....[it's actually not true] akaka..
su ching ...have u found ur hamsy..? stop hiding my dear..
me,ling and su ching...where is n.g?

ang ang....why r u hiding behind ur bottle..? playing hide and seek huh..?!

ang...honestly u r not SMALL la...

bottle cant help u to cover up ur whole body lo...=X

ah hien ...r u okay..?

quite dark neh ..where m i..?

ma classmates...

Pictures of the day at school...

what are they actually doing there..?
where got ppl sleep like this type of pose?

i want some .....anyway what are u eating there..?
sotz....looking up but pointing to somewhere....
Pui Thai ...nice pose huh...?
liau and suching...wee~

this is ....ah hien ...he has the same surename with me .. "i need some love from u"
me and ah fen ...*peace*

from left:angang,lingling,kethow,ME,vuikiat, suching
a model pose ...promoting w880i
puiyin,me,shukkiun and jojo
what am i doing there...? it's actually taken by ping...lol
this is my form teacher, Ngo jie
ling ling slept so tightly until she didnt even notice that i had taken her pic and posted it here...

=X